The Soccer Mastermind
by Kakarot Son
Summary: Our favourite Saiyan Prince is forced to chose a hobby, what happens when he's persuaded to choose Soccer?


**AN: A random Idea that spawned to me, it's set Post-Buu and I'm doing my best to keep Vegeta in character. Obviously it's a fic based on him, from his point of view in 3rd person, if that makes any sense... Short Prologue unfortunately**

**Disclaimer: Why would anyone ever think I'd own DBZ? I wish I owned DBZ, but my name's not Akira Toriyama is it?**

**"random stuff" = direct speech**

**_random stuff_ = thoughts**

"Woman!" yelled Vegeta storming into Bulma's messy office, "Fix the darn gravity machine"

Tilting her head slightly to the right, Bulma stared, her jaw slightly dropping, "Excuse me for a minute" she muttered to an employee, who was getting a promotion after 5 years of faithful service.

Getting up, her pink skirt fell down to her skinny legs, gracefully moving towards her husband, she yanked her husband into another room.

Smirking in satisfaction, Vegeta allowed _his _'Woman' to drag him into another room. Of course, the gravity room was no longer a problem; she had long since built a spare room preventing him from pissing the hell out of her every single minute of the day.

The real reason he had moved her out, was because he didn't like the man. He'd been attempting to, make a move on _his _Woman ever since he could remember. That bastard even tried to kiss her in front of the press once…

He was a famous scientist, Roger Bruce. An unusual name, even by Vegeta's standards, it took a lot of currency to purchase the fool, from Pill Inc., a rival of Capsule Corp. The day the he was transferred he'd tried to kiss _his _woman, live! Needless to say our favourite Saiyan Prince didn't take it very well, not even Kakarot had been able to stop him that day. The man's nose had been smashed into his brain, short of killing him. It'd taken an immediate surgery conducted by Bulma to move the bone back in place, followed by a direct healing by Dende. Not even the god could've done much without his Woman's help… God she was amazing, was she not? A pity she wasn't of Saiyan heritage, with the way she acts she may as well have been.

Anyway, where was he? Ah yes, the idiot still didn't get the hint and once again, tried to make a move on her, this time in private. It was really lucky that he took a break from training every now and then to check everyone's Ki signals. That included Kakarot, Kakarot's Brat, Green bean, Green Bean two, Kakarot's second brat, Scar Face, Triclops, the mime, Baldy, the android and most importantly Trunks and his Woman. He always checked up extra carefully on his Woman and his Brat. Strangely enough he also picked up on someone else's Ki signal next to her rising slowly, as if to do something big…

That time the idiot was handled with extreme caution that is if you call getting your back thrown through a couple of walls cautious… Lucky the woman had tried to replicate the rejuvenation tanks, though they failed as soon as Roger got out… What a waste.

Once again he was sure something was up this time, but of course he didn't want to get banished to that Kami-forsaken couch again, right? All he would do this time is distract the woman, and threaten the idiot, she'd never know!

"What do you want, Vegeta?" Bulma yelled, "You better not touch Roger again, thanks to you, no other scientist will come near me!"

His smirk not slipping, Vegeta answered, "Nothing… I just wanted you to fix the gravity machine."

Clenching her fists, Bulma almost screeched, "Don't lie to me! I made another one, so you wouldn't do this"

_Shit_ thought Vegeta, _Why did I forget about that_, he replied smugly, "Did I ever tell you, you looked attractive when you're angry?"

Completely thrown off guard by the compliment, Bulma clenched her teeth, "Your impossible! You know Vegeta, why don't you take up a hobby?"

"What are you on about Woman?" asked Vegeta as his left eyebrow worked its way up his forehead in confusion.

"You know, like Baseball?"Asked Bulma

"I will not lower myself to play the same game as scar face" replied Vegeta, swiftly

"Cricket?"

Vegeta shook his head, "this is a waste of my time… Why would I play with crickets?" (AN: He's referring to the insects here)

Bulma barely contained her laughter, "Okay, what about Soccer?"

"What the hell is that?" asked Vegeta

"The game that Trunks plays every Saturday morning" grinned Bulma, she had him.

"Stop wasting my time, I don't know what the hell you're talking about" hissed Vegeta, getting slightly peeved off; after all he was missing valuable training time. He had to get stronger than Kakarot and achieve Super Saiyan 3! All he was doing was protecting his mate.

"Oh come on Veggie, you took him last week, don't tell me you forgot your little present after that?" Bulma winked, grinned and reminded him of that eventful night. She'd managed to sign a contract, extending Capsule Corp. to Australia. Sales had gone bizarre; she'd easily made a 40 million plus profit.

"That's it!" scowled Vegeta, he'd been knocked of his stride, "I'm going to go train in the GR", and now he just needed a smart line to add, "Don't let the idiot over there use you…" (AN1)

_What's he talking about?_ Thought Bulma, before grinning, a perfect opening and she was going to strike, "I thought the GR was broken"

_Fuck_

**Authors Notes: Okay, he's the first chapter of my crack fic thingy, I'm still not sure if it classifies as one. Oh and don't worry about that Roger guy. He was made at a random moment and I felt I needed that extra touch for the first chapter; he's only going to be in the next one after that, I'll get rid of him.**

**AN1: You'll find out what he's talking about next chapter**

_**Song Inspiration: Going Through Changes- Eminem, Recovery and When I'm Gone-Eminem, Recovery.**_

_**You know that tempting voice in your head, telling you to review? Well it's your conscience and you better listen to it, or you'll go crazy!**_


End file.
